Skinny Fat

It's a pretty routine morning here around the house.  I have my husband home for a whopping 30 something hours before he leaves town again and I return to a single mother (single mother of a dog, but whatever).  This Saturday, like EVERY Saturday, I will share my husband with his true love...the gym.  While he does his usual workout (which is done at 4:30 every morning during the week), I spend my time cleaning the house.  But this morning I'm feeling a little under the weather due to a battle I lost with a bottle of cheap red wine.  Why does something that tastes so awesome going down make you feel like absolute crap the next day?  Well, since I'm lying around feeling sorry for myself and waiting on Man Meat to get home, I thought I'd share my own personal workout routine.  I recently heard an expression from one of our Crossfit (cult) friends...skinny fat.  Skinny fat is when someone may appear thin (thank you IBS), but is completely unhealthy, undefined and flabby.  THAT IS ME.  So I decided I needed to start working on my condition.

Enter a photo of my treadmill:

So you might be wondering, why am I showing you a random photo of my treadmill with a chair next to it?  Well, I'm one of those that's terrified of gyms.  I always feel like you have to workout, before you are allowed to go in there and workout.  I don't have the fake boobs, steroid look, wash board abs, or workout outfits (I prefer mickey mouse boxers) to join a gym.  And yes, these are just what I think the people in a gym look like, cause I obviously don't belong to one or ever go.
I figured there's only so much longer that I convince my husband that my slight weight gain has caused my larger rear to resemble that of Kim Kardashian, and not just a fat slob.  I don't think he's really buying into it anyways, but it's what I like to tell myself to keep from having a nervous breakdown.
I'm a completely lazy person, and feel that I to have some kind of reward for exercising.  And instead of paying $5 a month to have a cable box added to the TV in the basement, I came up with another way to distract myself and convince myself I need to start walking more:

I decided that I could use the chair and boxes to make a makeshift desk to hold my laptop, all so that I could play on Pinterest while I walk.  Ridiculous?  Yes.  But effective...also yes.  I've actually forced myself to get on the treadmill if I decide I want to play online.  Okay, only once this week, but that's one time more than the week before!  This could be the start of a new relationship with exercise!  I doubt it, but it could.

But, I have to get back to laying on the couch for now.  My whole skinny fat problem can wait until I feel a little better.